No, it's not Sex Panther (now with 40% more real panther!) It's desperation, and unlike great cologne, it rarely works 60% of the time, every time.
Saturday was not a good day. No, I did not have to use my AK, and I definitely did not mess around and get a triple-double. Instead, LSU decided that since all the other ranked schools in the SEC not named Alabama were losing, they would join in the fun. The effect of this poor judgment is that our College Teaser died, and more importantly, took our Winners Ticket with it. Now we are left looking for what to do with NFL games tomorrow.
Before we get to that, let's see what happened in college. First, Missouri continues to be a safe pick. We had been riding them for weeks and sat back after they lost their QB. No worries. They rolled Florida, and we're back on the Tiger's wagon. Second, FSU is the real deal. They went on the road and housed Clemson. It wasn't even close. They should finish the year with a clean slate. Third, Auburn is worth paying attention to. Even before the injury to Johnny Football, they were handling that game very well. They are clearly paying the right kids again. (Hi, Cam!) Other than a trip to Tennessee in a few weeks, they should win out until their final game when they host Alabama. Take the points. Fourth, Maryland is off the board. We were willing to ignore their beat down by FSU, but seeing the mess against Wake Forest, they can't be trusted. Fifth, I know it seems to fishy to highlight a small school, but Buffalo is the real deal. Finally, it looks like Alabama will cover any spread simply because they won't let the other team score. I haven't watched any games besides their trip to Johnny Football, but I have to assume that Saban is such a prick, his is just refusing to let the other teams use a football on offense. Hopefully, Auburn has enough $$$ in its player development budget to buy some balls and have a little left over for the refs.
On to the NFL ticket. We already have KC on a straight ticket. But we've lost 65% of the week's investments, so we need tomorrow's ticket to win, and win big. Now that we've said it, we know it won't, but that won't stop us from lighting our money on fire. Gambling is fun.
We are going to tweak the ticket this week, because we had excluded KC and SD from our original draft of the NFL tease since they were already on the Winners Ticket. (Ideally, we try to diversify our picks. See, LSU above.) Since that is dead, we're ignoring the advise of an old guy from Maine who lived near a pet cemetery and said that what's dead should stay dead. I don't recall all the details from his movie, but I'm pretty sure it all worked out in the end. With that in mind, we're taking KC, SD, DEN, CLE, and MIA.
Ideally, this will allow us to break even on the weekend.
We'v talked about KC and SD before. After seeing how Indy performed at SD, the Denver Mannings look like the perfect kind of team that will do well against that defense. Oh, and Von Miller is back with fresh legs, so the Denver D will be that much better. If Trent Richardson hasn't figured out his blitz assignment yet, it's not going to be a good day for Andrew Luck. Did I mention the part where Indy's owner called out Pey-Pey for not winning more while in Indy? Yeah, while I wanted nothing to do with this at the beginning of the week, now it just feels right. Miami is coming off a bye, at home, and has been interesting this season. They've also laid eggs. I like the Bills at home, not so much on the road and we may need to prepare ourselves for an NFL where the best linebacker is named Kiko. If Thad Lewis' isn't 100%, we're only one play away for Jeff Tuel and a cover! (Book club topic - how sad is it that Matt Leinert was worse that Tuel this year in Bills' camp?) Finally, Cleveland at Green Bay is enticing because of GB's injuries more than Cleveland's anything. The Browns are an amazingly milquetoast offense with a stellar defense. If Weeden can avoid turnovers, this should stay close. That sentence is not much different than me saying, "If Kate Upton calls me, I'm totally calling back." Neither will happen.
With that in mind, we are going to a 4 team teaser. CLE is off the ticket. Weeden just cannot be trusted. Also, I can't tell if Green Bay is snake bitten or not this year. The injuries tell me yes, but I still don't believe it.
We're currently sitting at 0 for the weekend. But if our luck changes, I'm going to take Dorothy Mantooth out for a nice seafood dinner and never call her back.
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